(no subject)

[toosuto]

I feel taller today. Better rested and in a good mood. I failed to turn in my application for Bureaucratic State Job™ (yay! My not going to be my boss told me he was jealous of me for be in the position to not apply even) and despite the continued discovery of the decrepit care given to the Testing Center Manager job I am covering I am still in a good mood. I finished reading a short selection of Chaung Tzu yesterday and realized this morning that I have generally been at my lowest points when I was trying desperately to grab at the things (jobs, hobbies whatever) that I thought would save me. My life is so much better when I don't work so hard to live it. Things aren't perfect, and they won't be, but they are pretty good.

Comments

[slownewsday.livejournal.com]

This entry is pretty. =]

I received your prints, yay! They are in fine condition and will be hung properly on our return to the UK.

Props to the Family Smith!

[toosuto.livejournal.com]

Hooray! I am glad they arrived safely!

Good mood

[murfomurf.livejournal.com]

So, you find you need to be "saved" from pursuing things too hard? I certainly do- it's very hard for me not to grasp at straws in the jobs field as people push me both ways and I'd really like to earn some money! I find it incredibly stressful applying for jobs now, as I have been rejected so many times and been told the most insulting reasons why I wasn't suitable for positions. Sometimes friends encourage me to apply, no matter what, then at other times they say "Just be happy living off someone else"- I CAN NEVER be happy living off someone else, but I am very avoidant of applications now. I hope you stay in a good mood and that things work oout at work and home and hobbies!

Re: Good mood

[toosuto.livejournal.com]

I suppose if I were to be more evangelical about it I would say everyone needs to be 'saved' from trying to hard but then I'm not much for convincing people I am right anymore. Grasping creates tension and unhappiness. If I 'grasped' either of the temp jobs I have now I would be miserable. They are horrible and spiteful jobs (at worst) or terribly dull and unrewarding (at best). By simply accepting that they are horrible and allowing them to expire in their time I am happier for (a) them ending and (b) the little good (eating etc.) they do allow me. Once I am free (unemployed) I'll apply at Starbucks and work on my illustration portfolio and see what happens because I have no idea what my future holds. I am learning to appreciate that last fact.